It is okay to allow yourself some time away from the children to focus on building other relationships because we do need to connect with the ones we love from time to time.
I am one who loves families so much and encourage parents to take time to bond even if it’s for a few hours over a cup of tea.
I would not love to leave the single parent out because these are things we hardly talk about. We all deserve time to ourselves and this does not make you a bad parent.
A good foundation for any family is a peaceful home built only by love. You cannot therefore give what you do not have even a good relationship with yourself and God is just as important so you can establish your home from these values.
Allow yourself to miss your children so that you can return home with renewed strength. This way you are able to be more patient with your children and not just your children but everyone else around you.
Time away gives us a great chance to even reflect on who exactly we are, our values, our beliefs and our purpose and if we are still in alignment with our dreams.
You will even reflect on your parenting role of your everyday life choices are aligned with your dreams. By the end of this post I desire that you see;
- You deserve time off
- The possibility of allowing yourself time, care and love
- Freeing yourself from the guilt of outing alone as parent or as a parent
- And start planning for your outing today!
It is important that you take the most from this post and that it should not be a burden to you financially but use what you have and what you are able to do. You will consider everything including your lifestyle so you can enjoy an outing or time alone and still return home content about your financial position.
Consider your life plans as a whole, short term goals and long term goals. Not only that but how young your children are and who can be able to watch them briefly.
This will help you know what kind of outing can work for you at the moment. If you are currently building a home, you may need to save up for some time for a getaway and may consider a dinner date at the time being.
You know the needs of your marriage better and what you long for, considering also your goals as a family so we live a peaceful life as we do things as a team.
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Consider the following;
- Dinner date
- Mini vacation/ Stay cation
- Breakfast
- Long vacation
Planning
Yup, you will need to plan for the outing. As much as it is fun to be spontaneous it might not work for you when you have children that are still young. It is good to alert whoever is watching your children ahead that you will be delayed or you will be away and alert he well ahead of time.
It may be less complicated if you have a stay in nanny, however it is always good to respect people enough to alert them on time.
Nothing will happen without planning for it, pick the day ahead!
Plan according to your needs now, if you need a mini vacation then plan and look at some of the things you need to consider on the points that follow.
Pay Nanny Overtime
Why go through all the trouble?
This is because families make communities and marriages make families so it is worth the effort. Basically find someone who can watch your children. Do consider how long it will take for you to be away and whether it is a couple of hours, a day or a couple of days.
If you have more than one child, consider that too. How much can your nanny handle? Consider how much work it takes to take care of your children. This will help you go over all necessary essentials before leaving.
Remember that this is more overtime and a little extra can encourage the nanny too. Let her know in time so she can change alter her plans too. I would advise this plan on a day’s date though without sleeping out.
Rope In Your Parents
If your parents are close by and up for the sleep over or your children may enjoy a visit at their grandparent’s home.
I know a lot of people feel really comfortable to leave their children with parents and this includes my husband and I. We know just how much they love and enjoy their grandchildren and most importantly they are so patient with them.
If you will be choosing to be away for the night or some days, rope in the grand parents. If you know it may be tough to handle your children if they are still younger then hire help but someone you know and trust to help your parents watch the children.
If Parents are far or you are not able to use grandparents for whatever reasons, someone who knows your children well and enjoys time with them may be a call away.
Prepare For the Children
Prepare for the children and what they will need. Of course we do not have all the time but we can create time. Knowing our children well makes life so much easier because we understand their needs pretty well.
Take into consideration the following list as you prepare for your children;
- Food
- Fruits and snacks
- Water
- Clothes
- Entertainment
- Bath essentials
- Sleep
These are quite broad, let them guide you and be a mini check list for getting all they need for them. Under clothes for example includes pajamas, underwear, warm clothes, light clothes and changing clothes. Be afraid not to communicate your needs to whoever will be watching your children.
Prepare For Yourselves
Prepare for yourselves too, depending on what you had planned. I notice that it may help to take a day off or leave work earlier so you drop the children earlier. This puts less pressure on you to drop and prepare for your children on time before you get to your dinner date late or leave late for your mini staycation (vacation in your home country).
Give yourself time to prepare your wardrobe too because you do not want to be worrying about what to wear when you are already away. Plan each day if you will be there more than one day. This gives you more time to important things like your bonding and really catching up with your spouse. I mean when the last time you had quiet time to yourselves was before the children.
Let Go Of the Guilt
I know that feeling in your stomach when you have to leave the children behind. It’s definitely not easy, however you are not a bad parent and you will make time for them when you are well rested and full of energy to continue the journey in parenting. I mean it is a lifetime journey, a couple of hours and a day or two will not take much from you.
Your children will be happy knowing you are a much nicer parent when refreshed.
You have planned and have prepared well for your children to be safe, loved and taken care of.
It really does take a community to raise children.
Plan for the Children’s Outing
When your return! Unless you have a toddler (s) they will just be happy to see you home. Older children already know when you leave them for a fun mommy and daddy time.
So plan their outing too and keep things balanced so they are happy too. Little things impress children but know what your children love but what i know for sure is that time with you is priceless!
So whether you desire some time alone with your spouse, your own time as a single parent with friends. This post is for you. Whether you work full time, work from home, are a stay at home parent you really deserve time off from your normal.
Rekindle that fire in you, the one that brought you here on earth and see yourself being healed and look forward to joyful days.
Learn to be creative, if money is tight learn ways that are free and can feel like an outing. You can even use your home and send your children to your parents. Enjoy a dinner for two! Life is big and love is expressed in many ways than I can actually mention here.
Wrapped in love!
Futhi Mkhwanazi
All Things Godly and Pretty 