10 Ways To The Perfect Weekends With Children

Tips To Being The Hands On Parent

We all desire to feel we are doing enough for our children even though we may not take time to understand the specific void but its always there!

Until we address it then it will keep lingering like an unfulfilled purpose. I know a lot will relate so well because we all want to be our best for our children and to be fully present but sometimes we do allow distractions to get in the way.

I chose weekends because i believe that most parents are working whether you run a business from home or you are employed, you still put in the hours that need your full attention. It may be different for stay at home parents because it is normal for them but they can benefit too by taking this as a reminder on things that just make life much simpler.

Decide What You Desire To Improve!

This will give you direction on what to focus on during weekends. Yes, we need to direct ourselves so that as we are consistent, six months later we can look at what we have improved and continue improving our lives.

Examples:

Cook More meals
Prepare for the following week
Organise your wadrobe
Plan meals for the week
Take the children for walks, hikes to the park, for hot chocolate, physical activities, camping!
Bath them yourself
Plan family nights
Wash their hair( i had been so bad at this one but i was always dissatisfied on ho my girls hair looked)

I have always wanted to take extra care of my girls hair by treating it and washing it during weekends. However i always convinced myself that i am always busy with cooking, bathing them and taking care of Company Invoices and quotations.

It was not until i was intentional about it to the point i decided to write it down. Now i just do their hair while bathing them then finish off when they are dressing up.

Create A Schedule

I know how this sounds to you especially knowing that its the weekend but now that we have children, we need a schedule so things run smooth in our homes.

We still need to prepare meals, keep them clean and hydrated, spend time with them and still run some errands.

The challenge with allowing this to just run wild is that eating times may be affected which will stress the entire family unless you plan on sandwiches for some meals but still they need to be prepared.

So i would say, know which times work for you when doing chores, running errands so that you can well relax knowing the most important tasks have been taken care of.

Involve Them In Your Schedule

It is not every weekend you will be able to be available 24/7 but you can plan around your children and the times you choose to be present and come home.

If you happen to attend an event that does not require you bring children along, including them in your schedule means you know what times you need to get home and be available for them.

This will most certainly pay off because you will not have guilt knowing as much as you spend the week in the office but you share and give time to your children too. Your children will be happy too knowing you give them time. It adds to their wellbeing and assurance.

As children grow you realise that time is something not easily recovered. However we have now to improve and to sow time and love into their lives.

Avoid Distracting Them With TV And Cellphones All The Time

As much as we live in times where technology may baby sit our children but we still have very important roles to play with our children and raising them.

I have learnt that this creates a habit where children self soothe themselves with gadgets whenever they have challenges in life and even avoid sleeping creating unhealthy sleeping patterns.

Children should have screen time ofcourse but sitting in front of the screen without using their creativity and imagination is not ideal i believe. The lovely part is we can still change this pattern as parents and allocate time for their activities.

It is okay for them to understand while they are young that there is time for everything!

Time To Do Chores
Time To Play
Time To Eat
Time To Drink
Time To Sleep
Time To wake Up

They are never too young to know that and the sooner they know this, the better!

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Use Your Free Time To Nurture Their Gifts

As the children grow we notice their passions, strengths, interests and gifts. On this blog we love to encourage ourselves as parents and other parents to not turn a blind eye on the children’s natural gifts and talents. This is what makes children to be so creative and imaginative as beings.

Sometimes we limit children in areas that we fear so much as parents and allow those fears to limit their lives and we do not explore it.

Many of us are really guilty of limiting their experience to what we already know. I am challenging you to research on how you can support your child who is

More athletic
Gymnast
Musician
Fashion and art
Loves drawing
Adventurous one
Soccer player

The adventurous child stresses most parents because they are not afraid of anything until you plant a seed of fear enough for them to be afraid.

Sometimes supporting them may be buying them a soccer ball if they really love kicking a ball around and allowing them to involve themselves in extra activities as you see fit as a parent so they discover themselves more and their capabilities.

House Hold Chores!

You would be amazed i had written a post on this one but the chores were not really consistent until i realised my children woke up to just open up the TV first thing in the morning.

It is not easy to train someone to change over night so if i wanted them to learn to wake up, pick up their toys, tidy their room and help with some child friendly or age appropriate chores together with us as parents on weekends. It will help teach them to be organised earlier and create good habits.

As we mentioned earlier that there is time for everything and there comes a time when we have to work and time to rest.

Being the hands on as a parent means you are aware also that parenting comes with teaching certain values you desire for the children to grow up having and modelling that to the children too.

Plan To Be Productive Yourself

Sleeping in on weekends can be rewarding for the body however if this is the case all the time we may be creating an unpleasant pattern of procrastination in most areas of our lives.

What i know about being productive is how you start your day normally creates or establishes how your day will go.

In what i have seen in myself and others is that if your day starts with a movie first thing when you wake up or maybe for you its a TV game then your day will be lazy.

If you really plan on watching a movie then wake up and bath, plan meals, clean your home, run errands then watch a movie knowing the important things are taken care of.

We condition most behaviour in our children as we model the life to them whether we are aware of it or not. You will not be a hands on parent if all you do is lazy around and send the nanny to do everything for your children even when you are at home. Which leads us to the next point.

“You will not be a hands on parent if all you do is lazy around and send your nanny to do everything for your children even when you are at home”

Deliberately Allow Your Nanny Weekends off!

I know that to some extent some of us cannot cope without our nanny but we learn and face our fears. It will happen that you may grow fond of knowing your nanny is around but to grow as a parent and to notice things that need your attention, create time alone with your children.

Allow your nanny to have weekends off for her benefit too. All of us need that time to rest and use that time to do much and strengthen your relationship with your children.

I remember how tough it was adjusting to having more than one child, i depended on my nanny too much that i could not feed my kids because they would refuse to eat from me but my husband would feed them though. This became an underlying fear until i decided to face it.

I would cook breakfast as normal but i would feed them every morning before dressing up for work in the morning. Children get used to routines and patterns, so at times it may work against you or work for you.

Another thing is that i used to attend a lot of functions i got invited to not realising that now more people at home need my attention. I Got tired, dissatisfied, very unhappy and unfulfilled.

It was not until i wanted to correct the void that i found my happy place as a mother. I know how easy it can be to depend on the nanny so if you feel personally you do not even know how to correct this, allow me to help you through this season so we can work together on options that will work for you to find fulfilment in your role as a parent.

Connect with me here; allthingsgodlypretty@gmail.com

Have Themed Weekends

Families were meant to thrive and to create wonderful memories together. Create the fun life for yourself and your family making it being hands on so much fun and nourishing to you all. Themed weekends can help you focus on one thing each weekend at least so you can easily decide what to focus on one weekend at a time.

There are four weekends in one month so each weekend can have a theme. For example:

Week 1: visit at the park; Week 2: movie night; Week 3 : Restaurant outing; Week 4: Drive and sight seeing

Taking on the role of parenting is different from the time before the children. However fully embracing the role means learning to balance and find harmony in your roles by keeping your priorities in mind.

A great way to being the hands on parent is to create themed weekends and it can kick start you to focusing on being present with your children.

Practise Self Discipline And Keep Distractions Away

We know how real this is and it happens in most homes. Where our focus is on whatever keeps us distracted and we lose focus on being consistent with our children.

I would say come up with a plan on how to keep your favourite things to do to not interfere with your time at home or wherever you are with your children. If you know all you do is scroll through media feed on the cell phone or laptop, switch it off for an hour until it becomes second nature.

What i have written is a guideline parents can follow but create their own ways that go with their lifestyle.

It is important to note that it is not in the doing but in what treasure you have in your heart and pursue that. Pursuing being a hands on parent may be far off for some because we live with many distractions and sometimes its the demands of our work and businesses that make us put aside or neglect our roles.

I know you got to this post because you know there is something deeper you desire on your parenting role and being involved.

Jay Shetty says you know the things you value (treasure) where you spend your time and money. So look into that and if you see a lacking in your parenting role then its time you evaluated your priorities.